just ride

chromeofficial:

college application: worth 10 goats on howmanygoats.com

college: ur in

thequeerclone:

the fact that there are no leaked nudes on my dashboard proves that i’m following the right people

teacher: don't bullshit this essay
me: i'm gonna bullshit this essay

anthxny:

#classact

nakedly:

you are not fat
you have fat 
you also have fingernails 
you are not fingernail 

usuallycrazy:

Can we discuss how really, really cool it is that Olivia Wilde is breastfeeding her son for Glamour magazine?
Can we establish that it’s really amazing that it will be showcasing female breasts for their intended purpose and showcases her as a mother, just doing mother things?
Can I say that I find this unbelievably cool and I’m really glad it’s a thing that’s happening?
Even if I can’t, I’m gonna. Because it is and I’m really glad it’s happening.

usuallycrazy:

Can we discuss how really, really cool it is that Olivia Wilde is breastfeeding her son for Glamour magazine?

Can we establish that it’s really amazing that it will be showcasing female breasts for their intended purpose and showcases her as a mother, just doing mother things?

Can I say that I find this unbelievably cool and I’m really glad it’s a thing that’s happening?

Even if I can’t, I’m gonna. Because it is and I’m really glad it’s happening.

*at a meet and greet with Ariana*
me: i just wanted to say that i love you and your music so much and i'll support you till the end my queen
ariana: awww thank you so much! wanna take a pic?
me: sure! *puts my arm around her and snatches a patch of her hair*
ariana: ouch!
me: *calls mariah* phase one complete master

dippity-do-not-touch-me:

once my sister got rejected for a job at a web design company that she really wanted to work for so that night she hacked into their website and redirected it to her blog and the next day the CEO called her and hired her on the spot so moral of the story: if at first you don’t succeed, hack their website and make them beg for mercy 

ilovesmoothjazz1998:

Name: Bitch
Gender: Bitch
Race: Bitch
Age: Bitch
Height: Bitch
Weight: Bitch
Reason for applying: I’m a bitch

My family’s expectations were very low, I think. None of us were from Hollywood and if I booked a Carl’s Jr. commercial they were like, “Holy Shit! That’s so cool.”
Chris Pratt, Prestige (2014)
lindsaychrist:

memories 

lindsaychrist:

memories 

sexaulity:

spicegorl:

j5h:

intelligence is such a turn on

so is a huge co*ck

why did you put an asterisk you still spelt the whole word